Stop Caring What Your Parents Think | Jordan Peterson

I needed to listen to this today. Seek advice. Not approval.

Thank you

Why should I stop caring what my Mom thinks she gave me and my brother life I'm a born Mama's girl

I need to review this every single day for so many reasons I will not include in a comment section. Thank you, Dr. Peterson!

My dads a narcissist. So he has himself confused with God. It’s impossible to have a peer relationship with my parents, so I keep them at an arms length

In south asia its incredibly difficult

I'm 20 and recently started making my own decisions by sometimes defying them. I am trying to establish a peer relationship based on mutual respect and understanding. It's going well so far since I'm not directly telling them they're wrong. That would sound condescending so I'm showing them that I'm capable of making sound choices.

He should teach on high school .

This is sticky. I love my parents and want their approval. They don’t always agree with the choices I make but as long as they are living, I will try to strive to be the kind of people they are and the kind of person they raised me to be. I respect, honor and cherish my parent’s opinion. They’ve helped me make great decisions and helped me out of loads of trouble. I dread the day when I can’t ask them “daddy, what do you think?” Or “Momma, how would you do this?”

I care because they cared for me..I care because I love them, I care because what they thought and said was more interesting and aware than you are

I still don't have a life with my mother who is 78 years old and I'm60 years old. I was a good kid. I'm still a good kid because I excelled and a good person . I stoped talking to my mother today. We just had a talk and she is who she always was and I tried to think better of her. I tried to accept her behaviors and i can't any longer. She insulted me today and thats it.

My parents are the most disrespectful you can ever see. They'd judge anything. They expect me to spend every single free day with them, all we do is to sit and to stare at TV. Whenever I do something else instead of seeing them for few days then they start manipulation, saying "well die and you don't even wanna see us etc." . I have achieved many things personally/financially. But my family makes me wanna die

My parents became wealthy 1st generation immigrants. Often they would tell me to work in the business because it’s for you. But when I tried to do anything creative, make decisions, problem solve, I was shot down. It hindered my growth and suppressed my creativity. I eventually realized my help in the business was for my parents. Right now I have 3 brothers over 30, one of those brothers is 41, working in the business off of a small stipend. They are lazy and my parents constantly complain but will never let them go either.

I love my parents dearly and want nothing but the best for them ❤
BUT…………… I feel like I’m always pretending to be what they want me to be instead of who I really am. They don’t approve or like the real me so I give them what they want. And I have major resentment towards them because of it! I hide it from them and it’s building 🤯 💥
I try and be the bigger person but it’s killing me 😞

I felt so unhappy when I tried to live the way my parents wanted me to. I still respect them, and I don’t hurt them. But sometimes their opinions on my life doesn’t fit with the way I want my life to be. Whenever I try to decide, my mom doesn’t speak, or listen to me, she ignores me until I change my mind. Which rarely happens

yes my parents deaths were crushing, dad when i was much younger and mother recently, both times extremely shocking, My parents were always my good friends and i could talk to them about anything and everything, neither of them ever forced us to do anything, they gave sound advice and they were very loving. It is hard for people to believe that, but it is true for me.. and i thank God every day for that..

Every time I try to confront/have a personal and decisive discussion with my mother about something that doesn't seem to be OK or if I'm trying to explain my point out, she keeps offending and comparing me to my father...

They're divorced, he's mentally ill (on pills to keep in check the schizophrenic disease) and this doesn't help me at all.

I had 2 step-dads, the biological one was often marginalized but luckily I can cope with it but it's hard sometimes...

I came to the conclusion that she hates masculinity in general, which is a toxic way to handle life after all.

My advice for someone in the same spot - go on your path, focus on yourself, ignore the negativity and distance yourself even more (when needed).

For everyone that read this - God bless you. You're stronger than you think

What an awesome message!

The first step is not needing them, get financially free of them, then everything else can fall into place.

my mom and dad say respect tham but thare not one thig to respect he kick out there kid when get to 24 and Verbal abuse is all the time and only cares what about what they what and what me to give tham massage for just geting me a soda and shit like it suck and they hate on the usa all the time im from the usa and she and but my dad is they suck as a mom and dad i what to leave but i dont what to go back to my real fam and shit but i cry all the time my life sucks sometime i what to end but i dont bc my dog and grand ma is hare

My parents gave me no direction.
I got dragged along to the family functions, but never really taught anything by them. I was just there.
Father was a workaholic a fisherman. i tagged along becasue there was no babysitter.
The house hold was where my mother resided. She was angry and disappointed she was held back by having children , and i noticed.
A very volitile household.
No chores, and when it was time to help out, i was screamed at.
The" love yous" before bed, were dry empty words for what seemed to be a way to make up for the angry dispositon, slamming cupboards, and constantly walking on eggshells.
My father never disciplined me.
Discipline came from mom and it was scary.
I remember crying alot.
Teenage years were always being scared.
Fast forward, i did manage to get a journeymans certificate. Than joined the army.
Ive noticed alot of the times since my divorce from my now ex wife,
My parents used me as a scapegoat.
Either all my decisions and goals were not worthy of their approval or i couldve done better at something.
I was relaeased from the army with a injury to my back and brain after a tour.
Both my parents could not seem to care less and ofton, point out my flaws.
Narrisisists is what ive amounted them both to.
Ive since told them both how i felt about them. How i was denied the teaching, respect, love and care i shouldve got as a child.
Both of them seem pretty pissed and i feel kinda good about getting i5 off my chest.
I am my own Man Now, and i couldnt care less about how they feel or think of me.
Im 41.

When I Was Younger I Was Always Taught to Put Family 1st,I Was Never Taught That It’d Come at a Such a Hefty Price,I Love my Family Always Will,But my Mental,&,Emotional Health Suck Now Because I’ve Always Done my Best to Put Them 1st,&,to Always Make Them Happy,I Have 0 Independence,I Hate Myself so Fucking Much

Anybody can do what they want cause your parents don't own you once your 18 you are your own problem

back when he wasnt fully insane and just sorta used too many words on a simple idea

I hope I can get rid of anyone I deem stupid.

“Sometimes it turns out being a monster is the right thing” this applies to us people who chronically feel the need to people please. Whether it’s my parents or strangers I worry about inconveniencing others and end up screwing myself all the time. Maybe I need a villain era to sort myself out 😅

So.. I think my parents are god. Despite overcoming the notion of my mother being a goddess strong enough to withstand the tragedy life threw at her and my fathers rejection

My parents support my sister more than I do. They fulfil all her wishes but when it comes to me they are like how expensive it is

I pay everyday, I payed my mental well being for caring what they think. Never again. They’re flawed hypocritical humans. They’re not God.

what video is this taken from?

We all have our special set of talents in life, I surpassed my father in automotive repair, but not in carpentry. Now whenever I build something eg. a roof on my porch, deck for my pool, etc. he takes over the project and makes me feel like a fool. The funny thing is, he knows his shit. But dammit man, I get so furious when I’m belittled like that.

The more older we get i came to the realisation that yes respect your parents but dont let them control you in such a way that you relaise later that youcouldve lived your life at the same time learn what they shouldve taught us was to be able to ask them whats wrong n right and also give us freedom in such a way that we dont fuck up ourselves but now its like a religion thing n society too binding us so i understand now y americans let their child leave the house .

My mother thinks that I can't do anything in my life, once I told her i want to study in a foreign country she looks at me and smile while she is telling me that I can't do that because I'm lazy and can't be independent...

its always the mfs that got no where in life that have the most to say bout how to live mine

I'm about to go full no contact with my mom. She wants to dictate everything right down to where i live. Publicly shamed me on facebook for my relationship. Now is kissing up because she knows I'm mad. Im done im completely done.

Thank you. There are strength in numbers indeed.

"You might still have got your parents confused with God"
So true, brother!

Make sense.

He isn't really saying anythig with this lecture

If any parents are reading the comments - take this as a warning of how your children can grow up to resent you if you tyrannise their life.
Maybe ultimately it's not so bad to leave your parents behind like a bird leaving the nest but I still like to hope that being able to enjoy their presence at an older age is a wonderful thing that should be fought to have as much as possible. But alas if you've tried everything and nothing works, it really is okay to let them go honorably.

I needed this and I hear you JP! Thank you 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻

Im 54 and yes my mom treats me like a child she knows she cant stop me im an adult thats why imma move and also abt a cpl weeks ago i blocked half my fam members cuz i outgrew them and i hardly talk to them

Some parents think YOU OWE THEM BECAUSE THEY CHOOSE NOT TO ABORT YOU . and even if you give help and respect them they still want more and more and until you lack self respect . ASIAN parents are the worst !! They think they need to have kids so someone will care of them when they are old . We are used as slaves and they don’t even say Thankyou !

I became very spiritual. I see my spiritual higher power as my parent. I love them and they love me. My parents opinions don't mean anything to me. They failed to protect me and sabotaged my dreams.

They didn't protect me and they sabotaged my dreams. How can you forgive but maybe the bigger question is why should you? Better to accept and move on.

I want to pierce my ear and I know my parents won't like it but I can't relax and what would you recommend / I'm 19 years old

Fuk this grind. You are not clean. AI is here. It is very Dirty

Mines went rogue when i dyed my hair and got even more mad when i talked back saying how irrelevant it was :/
My psychologist didn't even care 'bout it, and everyone i know was cheering me on except for them. I think (this is kinda dark) that they're mad I'm not blonde anymore because they considered it a superior colour...
Anyways, tried using common sense but doesn't work. Any ideas?

Got my PS5 taken away. Because of karen parenting

I wish my mother was realistic. She blames me for everything, never takes my side in any situation, etc. She's a blame thrower, she's SUPER manipulative, and she tucks tail when you call her out. She doesn't believe she's wrong, EVER. I'm just going to treat her well, and ignore her ideas, because my dad thought for her for almost forty years, and now she doesn't know what to do, doesn't listen to anyone, and doesn't care if anyone else is damaged by her flagrantly stupid choices