Healing from Sexual Abuse & Incest

I have issues such as this and I recently just started a Gofundme page. I just need to make a video to start raising funds to afford proper treatment

You are like the sun. Your ways of validation and encouragement radiates right through the screen, like, hearing your voice is like seeing a smile. Inbetween everything you say, there's a whisper: "it's gonna be alright" and I am stunned by how generous you are. Thank you. For making these videos and helping strangers heal. I find your tips and advice - and the way you deliver them - so incredibly helpful. Seriously, thank you for being there.

I feel as if I was molested when I was younger. I was on a field trip and when I was asleep I woke up, my hands were on my private parts and my teacher was hovering above me with the covers of me. I don’t know who to talk to about this.

it was my cousin i was 14 he was 19 he made me be nice to him or hed yell at me and hes yell would scare me and i regret being nice to him becouse he was my cousin and he was mean to my grandma and refused to leave her house and hed yell at her she thought it was some reandom boy that i brought home she didnt know it was my cousin when he first started texting me i didnt know who he was until he told me then i asked my dad if he know so and so that had the same name as ours he said yes but i blocked him and one of my friends gave him my address so he came over and my parents let him in he went into my room and then sexual assulted me my parnets thought that he was one of my friends he ended up staying in my room for 3 weeks my grandma kept calling my ant finally the cops got called he sexual assulted me all that time and deserspected my grandma the reason why my grandma couldnt walk in was becouse he locked the door

when i was small may be around 6 or 7 , the place where i live with my family on rent there son used to bring me in his room for watching tv and close the door and touch my private parts and it happens for long time i was so small i don't know whether it is good or bad and i couldn't tell anyone about it. Its been many years i dont remember much but just some instincts i remember i just want to forget those to and heal through my past so badly. I badly want to heal from that trauma i hope so i succeed in it

Bless your heart, thank you ❤

I need help right npw but police and fbi are doing nothing about my incest family and im pissed.

Im a prouct of incest and my family is tryin to force me to take drugs so thier gross husbands dont go down for pedophilia while they talked about torturing pedophiles amd snitches when thier pedophiles and snitches!!!

Lord, please.

I love the complex ptsd by Pete Walker too~ thanks for addressing this

I’m not advocating for staying stagnant but I really appreciate how you present the question of are you ready to heal/move on. Sometimes the stuckness can shed insight on how we were violated. There is so much societal pressure to move on quickly but for me it’s taken years to understand the damage done to me in my childhood. I love that you state we have a choice in how we are sexual as well. I also love the distinction between healthy sex and unhealthy sex. How one’s body responded to be violated brings up a variety of emotions. I’m definitely ordering this workbook.

I feel so bad mentally and physically im 23 years old i think i was sexually molested at age i cant remember because i would do it to others at a very young age it was at my moms salon and i would do it with the stylist son i think i was 6 or 5 idk but i do remember it happened lots of other times to others i think either i or them initiated i cant remember 2nd grade during encore i did it with another male and further more several family members 4 total and 2 i initiated and 2 were 6 to 6
7 years younger than me 😢i wish i could go back in time i think i was touched first i remember when i used to get picked up at a young age and i used to one to suck womens breast and i wasnt even breast fed

I am so completely messed up that i dont think i could ever be in another relationship. If a guy even tries to touch me i freeze up. I had a male friend say that he hated my ex.husband for the trauma he put me through. What he doesn't know is that the trauma started way before the ex. It just got worse when i was with him. I don't know if there is hope or help for me.

Are there any specific resources or help for this situation? Is anybody out here able to point us in the right direction to get good quality professional help for childhood sexual trauma that lead to decades long incest? Please help.

This is a good book

As the man (Gen 1:26-28) KJV, a husband (Gen 2:21-25) and a father (Gen 3:16), the minister of God (Rom 13), teacher (Eph 4) and one of the survivors who was bullied in school, I am so sorry this happened to you. Every time I see and/or hear anything like this, I see my wife or my daughters. If I could have protected you from being harmed by "it", I would have, but I can not be everywhere all at once. (1 John 4) I am pleased to know you are healing.

How to heal sexually?😢

what page is this?

Could you do a video about fraternal incest? I talked to my parents they are paying for therapy by EMDR, but I still have a lot of time with my brother. Before him coming I always have several day of panic, but when he is finally here we have a normal situation were we get along. He stopped being a dickehead to me only one year ago, he does me gifts etc. But he don't want to talk about it, nor take therapy and it just feels so weird to me because he will never be judged by his friends, our extended family, even my parents still love him an accompany him like before I told them and it hurts... I thought of financial solutions such has him paying for my mental health sessions. Don't know about the justice choice... I would feel guilty of putting him in prison and breaking the balance of family and he did this 10 years ago at 12/13yo so is that just to punish him now? Will prison make him better? I don't think so...

Wowwwww. Sister, thanks for this post...

But
I was told that the reason that I treat men badly is because of the childhood molestation problem. It makes sense But I don’t know what to do. Lot of tines I don’t realize what I am doing until I am called-out on a situation, after it happens. (‘It’ being abusive towards men)
How do I work on that???

I tried to forget things but when someone would remind me of the sexual assault and rape that happened to me in the past! It ruins my life again!

It’s part of my history and it is not easy to be a victim of sexual abuse!

I chose not to go out and just stay at home since I’ve been in United States of America!!!! The man who raped me is from California

The way I dealt with my trauma was to develop a fetish around the type of abuse (ddlg and similar things) It's something I think is problematic, but for societal pressure issues than anything else. Should I go through the work to try to heal past this, and retrain myself sexually? Is what I'm doing okay? Will it come back to harm me, in the form of physical illness like much trauma does? I have so many questions.

I need to say this

And I’m 22 now

My brother was born 1998 he’s the second child and I’m the 5th child outta two miscarriages plus I have special needs my brother sexually abused me 3 times at a young age and I was 11 going on 12 I couldn’t tell my special Ed because I was scared I was going to die because my brother had a gun at home till this day I’m still traumatized by it and sibling sexual abuse was going on by in generations and generations before I was born on my mom side of family and my mom mom had 15 siblings plus my mom favoritisms my brother and sister and there dads over me and my dad so it’s a hard situation to overcome

Because of the abuse I endured I am unable to be in relationships. When I do have sex its a one and done thing. I feel I have to hurt them b4 they can hurt me.

Sorry

You never get over it

Im too struggling to overcome assaults trauma

I m a boy
A. Uncle has raped me at 15
I used to go there for playing and also repair mobile sometimes ( corrections of date 📅 and another thing) but he showed me pornography and her private part. And he also demanded to open my private part
He raped me
I. Was unaware about what is happening to me but I realised something is wrong so I. Didn't not visited her home...........a uncle was sent to me it's a normal work every boy do so I feel it's normal but has uncle told to me it's a normal work so after some days when I went to my relative home then a small girl also was lying on the bed so I tried to RAPE. With she but thanks god I could not do she saved from me. When I turned 19 then I was thinking what was I doing and what has happened to me 😭😭😭. I was not aware about good touch and bad touch I was not aware about sexual abuse......... I always feel sad for that girl also 😭 cry. But thanks god that girl saved I couldn't do wrong with she . Now I know what is the definition of RAPE but according to this definition I couldn't do something wrong with she but but when I think about she I angry at my self

I want a friend
I always feel alone cry anxiety suside thoughts

I have faced sexual abuse in my life approx 7 to. 8 times
But that uncle groomed me and manipulate me for wrong things😢
When I turned 19 then I realise he raped me😢
I need a friend

Are you talking from experiences.. if not then anyone can read books and articles most of which are famtasy

For me I find that my past sexual abuse has made me a
more sexual person. When my uncle started sleeping with me I began letting others have sex with me too because in my mind I thought it would be gross if I was only sleeping with my uncle. Now I can make myself have sex with almost anyone and have an orgasm.

I am a survivor. My dad molested me. My cousin molest me and a boy I was dating at 15 yo raped me. Men have used me my whole life. Both husbands - abusive. I hate men - except for my son and my brothers. So many women are coming out of the closet to tell their stories and it's scary. It happens way too much. I seriously hate men. Hate them. They are nothing but walking penises and all they give a shit about is getting laid. Sick. Sex is sick.

Kati and Paul this was a excellent discussion between you and demonstrating that empathy and thoughtfulness makes a real difference.

I haven’t even started the video yet and I’m already about to cry because your even talking about it…

Can a sexual abuse in your elementary age, lead to your sexual appetite in later years of your life?

how do I heal when I'm still living with my abuser since the age of 16 to now 20 I'm scared

Do you think that at some
Point I should tell
My husband about why happened to me as a child?

Is there ever total healing...

I was molested by an older family member. I was around 8 or 9 and she 13 or 14. Years get fuzzy I have PTSD from other issues and my memory is horrible. I had no idea what was going on. I just started puberty early and couldn't even get "up" at that point at least when the acts started. She told me to do this I never understood till a few years later. For the next couple months this went on almost nightly. It's really messed up a lot of things mentally for me especially with my gf and family. It's something that I take into the bedroom. I hate myself for it. I'll end myself if I ever consider such an act besides pretend. It's my biggest shame and it's hard to have a relationship with my gf.

i was around 6 or 7 now im 22 and struggle to cope i just smoke weed watch shows movies or play video games and pretend im not me for awhile its not the best way to cope but keeps me from having emotional freak outs and thinking too much i even do feel like different people sometimes because i have no idea who i am and i want to die but don't have the strength to kill my self im in hell

I am going to have to disagree with the beginning of this and the fact that having an understanding and supporting partner as key to success in this kind of healing. Most people that were sexually abused by their parents were repeatedly sexually abused and not just a one-time occurrence, not saying that there is not one time occurrences by other family members but more than not these situations happen throughout a person's whole young childhood life. Therefore the trauma impact that it has throughout the rest of the child's life in adulthood just gets repeated even after they leave the abusive situation or they move out of their parents house. The only way for the inner child to repeat this process is to find a partner that identifies with the same aspects of their abusive parent and they do this in a final attempt to heal the relationship that never was there and get there unmet needs finally fulfilled. Therefore it's going to be very hard and very rare to find somebody that has yet to heal from sexual incest abuse or any abuse for that matter, and have them actually be with a partner that has the capability to be supportive and empathetic and understanding and helpful in their recovery. 90% of those people are going to go into adulthood and find partners like their parents most narcissistic or psychopaths narcissist and psychopaths are the furthest thing from anything that would be needed in a successful recovery from their childhood abuse. Those kind of partners specifically are going to be there to repeat the abuse over and over and over. So as much as It is desired, having a partner that's understanding, supportive and helpful during recovery from childhood sexual abuse, it's very unlikely that that will ever happen before you begin recovery. Therefore the idea of having that kind of partner as the key to our successful recovery, is basically setting a bunch of people up to fail and to focus their energy on something that's not even relevant to their recovery success. They don't need to go find a partner that will be there for them before they can ever recover, but at the same time they also will find it impossible to recover successfully if they are with a partner that is abusive, narcissistic, self-indulged, or cold and shameful. So while having a non supportive partner will prevent a successful recovery is very much true, it however it is false to believe that you would have to have a supportive partner in order to have a successful recovery. And I find it pretty upsetting to know that crazy information would be implied and how many individuals actually spent time and energy focusing on finding that partner before beginning recovery.
Not only that it takes absolutely no one but yourself to recover from any kind of abuse from childhood. It's actually a fact that you alone are the only one that can heal yourself from that childhood. The thought of somebody else needing to be there in order for us to find healing is absolutely ridiculous. That gives away your power to control the outcome of your life and your healing. That implies to someone that somebody else in this world (that nurturing partner) is absolutely needed in order for healing to be possible and most of us can't find that kind of partner until long after our healing has been completed. That gives away the fact that you have control over how your self turns out and in turn your feelings your thoughts your mental stability future relationship attachment your next generation of Ken all of that is affected in recovery and therefore all of that is under the control of not only you but your ability to find somebody else that can provide you with what you need. Crazy information to even think to be true in the first place and it also not only prolongs the recovery of people who believe this but it also probably stopped a lot of recovery hope for people who believe this when they could not find a partner that gave them what they needed in order to be able to heal they probably gave up just as most people does with or without this knowledge and finding a partner to have that kind of attachment style that was needed back in childhood
. You should never pick a partner in hopes that they meet your unmet needs as an adult or a child. You should not lean on each other in the relationship you should stand alone and have a relationship together but on your own at the same time. You should not need each other but want each other and one person success should not dictate the outcome of the other person success.. this leaning on dynamic is what defines as codependency which it also is a very big known attachment result from Early childhood abuse and neglect. So believing that you would need somebody else on this world whether it is a partner a child or a friend, is the very idea that gives away your power and a chance at healing. You should never need anybody for anything you should want them. You should be able to stand tall on your own and pick a partner that can stand tall on their own and together you guys can form a life that stands tall together but not on a basis of relying on the other for your own needs. So as much as I understand the fact that you cannot find full successful healing in recovery when you are with a partner that is not helpful and supportive and safe, it's also not needed to have a partner that is those things in order for you to heal.

Unfortunately because of this being said I no longer believe nor support this lady or her ideas at successful healing.

❤

I’m remembering my dad & his dad sexually assaulting me since I was an infant. I recently told his wife when she asked why I am the way I am and she said she wouldn’t tell anyone and told him right away & I am facing the wrath from him. I’ve experienced homelessness from him & im working on being independent before something worse happens

I have sex but I disassociate and think Im not connecting to my partner emotionally physically intimately. I can play a good part but it is affecting my relationship.

How do victims treat there partners can they have more than 1fobia.should I feel in danger .TKS trying to get a handle on what's happening

I love this channel, basically porn.

You are brilliant. Thanks for your great work

You never will :)

This felt so good to hear. I have been recapitulating from my experiences. I’ve been abused from a young age by care givers and people I have trusted. The most recent was in 2018 and I completely shut down because I couldn’t suppress it anymore. I started a relationship at the time and he was not able to support me during this resurgence of trauma and left me. I’ve had a hard time being gentle on myself because deep down I don’t trust anyone to love me through this. I know that it isn’t going to help if I keep trying to rush myself on someone else’s agenda. I need to try and love myself through this and be patient on myself. I firmly believe the right person will stay even if it’s hard.

It’s not my fault!