Writing Vivid Descriptions (and when to shut up) | On Writing

What's the most VIVID fictional place/world for you?? ☺️☺️ Or your fav bit of your own descriptive writing?? Stay nerdy!

~ Tim

When you’re writing descriptions, personification helps.
Instead of saying, “The house was old and dilapidated”, you can say, “The house leaned on its neighbor, as if tired of standing all those years.”

The balance between how much is needed in terms of detail is one that kicks me over and over. In fact, it's why I rewrote one of my fics and didn't describe any of the characters' appearances, because every time I tried it came out too clunky. I'm currently in the process of rectifying that.

I know people who write paragraphs of detail to set scenes, and I know people who do not. Balance is something that will kick you over the head.

The credits, I was in the kitchen and thought somehow that I'd queued up an atmosphere video without actually doing said thing.

Great video! But did you know there's actually no such word as "Particarly"? Am I being a pedantic grammar nazi? Yes. But would you accept someone saying "Pacific" instead of "Specific"?

The way Margaret Atwood writes, feel like a vague, flowery shopping list. I don't like it at all. I know, it's not my kind of story, the subject doesn't interest me, but that doesn't change the fact most of what she wrote is pointless. There's no reason to describe a gym in more than a few words. If there is a reason to talk about the painted circles, then fine, but if not, forget it, everyone knows what an old gym looks and smells like. As for Tolkien, he was the original, when he wrote his books, most people outside of Britain didn't have much of an idea, what a real castle looked like. He created an entire world, if he hadn't described it in such detail, then people would have the wrong idea, not how he wanted it to be thought of at least.

I had a Russian professor at a Russian university who strongly felt that Leo Tolstoi was an overrated author who suffered from graphomania, precisely because his prose was bloated with overwrought, prolix descriptions of every oak tree.

I have something like synthesia on smells. If an author describes the scene well (even not mentioning the sense of smell itself) I can "smell it". That is how I can often tell if the book is good or not. The real good ones are always made of multiple fragrances and sometimes change them😂

As a fan of Tolkien and Sanderson - Curse you! J.K. If I could only write half as well as them. Others give them a great defense, so I won't bother. I will just say that their styles works for them. It does not please everyone as plenty of comments make clear. Every few years I read LOTR again and love it every time.

Bilbo's house

my favorite instance of someone not understanding how effective description works was when my teacher read Kafka's Transformation with us and spent a legit half-hour trying to reconstruct how the apartment looks, i.e if a room was on the left or right. Meanwhile, I knew exactly what the room looked like, because there was really good description of the art, the furniture, etc. Like, honey, yes he doesn't give us a floorplan, but we don't need one. As long as the author knows and it's consistent, who gives a damn. The book's a metaphor. And it's well done, too, but yeah sure, it's made or broken by if the kitchen is on the left or right.

Less is more.

Hands down, the most vivid fictional universe I’ve ever been immersed in is The Expanse. It is both shown on screen and described in the books as a living, breathing world that has oceans more stuff going on than what you see through the characters.

been watching your stuff here and on nebula, and i really appreciate how straightforward and applicable most of your advice is. to the point and with clear examples 👍

I once had to read a book for school. It was a thick book, so it had most points. It was 'the porcelain mirror' (in Dutch). I can remember it had a 15 (!) PAGE long description of a house, and its surroundings. They would describe a visiting aunts dress for like 30 sentences. Including the smell it reminded her off etc. NOTHING happened in the book. It was 99 percent description, of the zero percent story. It just told 'then she married him, he looked like (long description), then they got four children, (long descriptions)', etc, etc. I have never, ever, in my life, read such a boring book.

I can write dialogue very well, but I struggle with descriptions and the narration. Can someone give me tips for the latter two?

Want to write well?
1 Go fight in a war, know your senses are operating at their physical peak as the mortars are falling and bullets a flying.
2 Get married and have children, hold your child and look in their eyes, and experience the love akin to a god for their vulnerable creation.
3 Follow your dreams and fail, feel the black depths of heartbreak and existential angst and become suicidal. Instead of deleting yourself, drink heavily and read Albert Camus DO NOT read Jean Paul Sartre he was a Stalinist bootlicker and his girlfriend advocated pedophilia.

Also stop reading books by western women who do not have real problems as they do not understand conflict or character. Instead read the Tale of the Genji, it captures the Prime Symbol of Japanese culture.
And do not read books by men are obese and who have neither wives nor children, for they are genetic failures.


I agree that Tolkien is highly overrated. DO NOT attempt to write like him. Instead follow his life (war, marriage, children etc.)
Everyone should read Robert E Howard instead. Start with the Queen of the Black Coast.

Good luck Kings.

Tolkien could get away with the long lists of details because he's already earned that from the story's start. Give something good initially; people will allow most anything along the way.

Hell yes! Extra Credits in the house!

Also, GRRM MUST FINISH THE BOOKS 😢 🙏

The children of time series is amazing! Also, Doors of Eden is a good one-off by Tchaikovsky

i have seen the exact opposite problem amateur writers. they don't want to describe a single damn thing, not even one line of description. And when i try to tell them "hey maybe describe one thing?" they tell me "No. Every bit of writing advice says not to." i think we need to stop giving writer's this advice that description is bad.

You remind me of a time when I had picked up a new book by an author, I have not read before. I am a big fan of Louis l’Amour, and he describes things as it pertains to the story. Even though at times, he goes into detail, it is part of the story as it is moving forward. This new ride it was described as a another Louis l’Amour so that intrigue me so I bought the book. I read the entire first chapter, put down the book and never picked it up again. This writer described every detail of every person that this main character met. But after reading a whole chapter, I still have no idea what the story is about. It’s a perfect example of over, describing and forgetting to tell the story.

Narnia always felt real

JR a book that is 700 pages of dialogue with 5% description.

I bringe down up on your house the noust vile of rot

I will accept your criticism of Tolkien, because you also criticized Sandon Branderson for similar faults. BUT I'LL HAVE YOU KNOW, that the time in between was reeeeeeaaaaally tense.

This is very helpful, bless your channel

My rule of thumb, as a discovery writer, is that I should only describe the things that a character is actively perceiving or interacting with in some way.

Ayo was that a Murphy feature????

I hate the smell of old sex in a room

I liked and subscribe to this channel—not only because the video was great—but because the comments were fantastic.

I also think that if you're too specific with your description, you take away a chunk of the reader's imagination. Is one of the things I really like; you can read the same setting yet imagine a slightly different one that other people.
I rather describe my settings an characters' feelings and interpretation of their surrounding. And try to give more time to work in a better plot, or improve the dialog.

Anyway, happy writing ❤

Some of the more easily vivid imaginations I had in fiction is the Needle Tower and the entire world of Insignia by S.J. Kincaid. Is truly amazing and my favorite book.

A way to summarize this video is: "If your sentence doesn't say more than what it says, don't include that sentence." For example, whether you write about a character brushing his teeth all depends on whether you can use that to say more than just, "He brushed his teeth." You could write, "He brushed his teeth the same way he had for the last fifty years." or you could write, "He brushed his teeth calculating each stroke of the toothbrush." but if all you are going to write is, "He brushed his teeth." don't write it at all.

This goes for descriptions too. Don't write, "He had blue eyes." unless you are going to use those blue eyes to say something more than the color of his eyes. There's nothing wrong with using the word "blue" but use those blue eyes somehow. Don't write, "The door was white" unless you are going to use that white door to say something more than the color of the door.

Familiarize yourself with the concept of Chekhov's Gun. Your reader expects everything you write to mean something. Unlike Chekhov's Gun, this doesn't mean that everything you write has to be part of the plot, but it does mean that random, meaningless details should not be included in your writing.

no one is stealing ur books ur schizophrenic

Tolstoy never watched this video

This comment might sound silly but your video help me get a better apreciate for writting, becouse i always loved stories but my favorite medium was always movies and animation i love how you can visually show so much and how there was no need for words, but books were opposite of that were the only thing you had was words and i always thought that was boring, how you can only describe stuff becouse i believed the best way is to show it, but listening to so many example made me realized how writting can be such an intresting art medium to show stories and emotions and how it also can be used in intrsuting ways

Great explanation

Hard agree on Tolkien

A silence in three parts, you say? 👀👀

So you are basically telling to respect the chekhov's gun.

Bravo to the voice actors they are all bringing these descriptions to life

"What makes these places so vivid and magical and how do you capture it?"

With the power of FRIENDSHIP.

What I really want it to have confidence int next words.

Didn't expect the merphy napier cameo there lol.

The ship was floating in the air, much unlike a brick

What I try to do is have a purpose for everything I write. Does it set me up for something later? Does it help the reader to understand where we are? Does it endear the reader to a character or place? It doesn’t have to be big but I’ve noticed in a lot of beginner level writing that the author will include something that’s has no other purpose for being there other than to add more length. Maybe it’s because I used to be a writing tutor but I also highly value editing. If I can’t make up my mind then I just add the main idea of what I want and move on.