What no one ever told you about people who are single | Bella DePaulo | TEDxUHasselt

Single life is so much better, just take care of yourself and that’s it

Sorry but most of this is cope from single people like me. I'm sick of this pondering.

Thank you for your precious lecture! I couldn't link marriage to happiness. I'm happy to be single. Actually, I spent most of my 20s at school. It means, I shouldn't be in a relationship or think of marriage during the period. Even after graduation, I am still accustomed to the comfortableness that singlehood provides me.

I believe happinnes is not dictated by being single, married, or whatever. Different people have different needs

Being single is a joy 😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊

The crowd has NOT passed the vibe check haha 😅

Audience of aspiring or currently married people 😜So grateful to find this talk, there's not much positive info out there on proactively choosing solo life.

I can see why she has been single her whole life 😅

A personal preference: getting married vs. staying single has no need for a debate. Either choice isn’t ‘wrong’ in itself.

If everyone choose to be single, then end of human would be sooner 😮 she's growing old, but not up 😊

Thank GOD! Someone finally said it, and put it so eloquently.

That her opening words, introducing herself as having been single her whole life were so powerful, really says it all

Her laughing while talking along with her voice makes this unbearable to listen to. The audience must have been miserable.

Think you can be happy or sad either married or single.

being single is great when you've cultivated hobbies and self-driven interest in life. to any haters of singledom ("but who will procreate??") don't worry the pattern is self-limiting across generations for obvious reasons (those with a strong drive to pair up and reproduce produce more of that type).

I am single and happy just enjoy your own freedom see the world taste different cuisine and explore more read books and be happy

Single people are the most happy people on the planet.

Thank u

omg some one it's telling my history 😮😮😮😮

65 million adults in US say they like being single

Sharing has the biggest role to play in developing our fantasy with the society, so getting mingle is also important in that case👍

No matter married or single, you just need to be happy with your choice.

Feeling fulfilled single is easier

I think I married the love of my life and it was bliss for about three and a half years (from courting). Cloud 9 finding the one. Then we had a child and soon after got divorced due to life pressure/neuroses. Was and still is traumatic losing your soulmate. However, there is much freedom and space. And a beautiful daughter. My mum used to say men and women are not designed to live with each other. I think she was a very clever lady - could always nail and summarise a situation succinctly

This should have been called "Ramblings of a bitter incel." She's obviously so angry about being single. You can hear it in her attitude and sarcasm. She's bitter, trying to rationalize it, and even worse trying to convince others of it. There is nothing wrong with being single, no one is saying that, and there is really no need for her rant. Just do you. But she obviously doesn't even believe what she's saying, based on her preaching. Guaranteed that if someone actually wanted to marry this woman, she would drop this charade in an instant; but that will probably never happen, so she will carry on.

I listen to your Ted talk over and over again and I agree with you wholeheartedly. I see many people are not living a vibrant life because they’re stuck in the marriage and they don’t know how to get out in another words they have no way to get out but grind it out.

She's beyond adorable!

I was in relationships all my life, after the 3rd one didn't work out, I decided to go a couple of years, not dating. I loved it. It's been five years, and im dating someone, but I'm questioning if I'll ever give up my peace. Relationships are hard, and rarely will both parties actually be willing to put in the work. Im in a long-distance relationship, and I'm content to keep it that way. I don't know if I can go back to being 24/7 with someone.

The women I've met I wouldn't let tie my shoes.

The concept of people feeling weird about perpetually single people (no matter if it’s other people or themselves) is fundamentally puzzling to me. Why is it weird that we feel comfortable by ourselves, can live independently and contently, have complete control of our time and can thrive in our own company? Why is it weird that people enjoy their own company? Sure, loneliness can be felt by some people, but for others solitude is the most precious thing we can give ourselves in this life.

Real happy ppl don’t have time and have go around to tell and preach to ppl how happy they are……yeah, sure, you’re very happy…..pathetic…..no one would care or remember you….yes, there is no one there for you…..” yeah, everything all about yourself, about you!” Wow, a true narcissist show the color!

When you are single you can take all that love and encouragement and tolerance that you would have devoted to another person and give it out to the world at large, and everyone benefits :)

Most people want children, most people want a relationship with someone special, or at least to experience it in their lifetime. That does not mean you can't enjoy being single, for a time at least. However, very few people will be happy going through life with no romantic relationships ever and no children. Sure there are some, but for most people that would be miserable. I don't care what anyone says, people need social connections, whether that be partners, children or both. Being single forever will make you miserable.

What people don't understand is that not all circumstances of being single are the same. You could be single for life, single after a divorce or death of a partner, single at 20, single at 65, single but with children, single with a lot of friends, or without a lot of friends. Not all single people are in the same situation. Not even close. Just like not all people in relationships are the same, not all single people are the same either.

In spanish.. there's a phrase ... "mejor solo ... que mal acompanado " ... better alone than bad company

One thing I have noticed is that having kids ultimately benefits the government and the country you live in, by providing a labour force. You have no obligation to raise a family apart from your biological need to procreate. I believe that the world will not be fit for human existence soon therefore I choose not to.

And yes they (government) always tells you how great its is to get married but never tells you the dark side.

Do u ever feel lonely?

Meh, zero impact

I'm 35, woman and single. Not sure if I'm afraid of commitment or just happy single. I never really wanted to marry, but I wanted children. Now with the state of the world I would feel irresponsible bringing kids, and fostering single seems daunting. When I've found perfect men that wanted serious relationships I've freaked out, feeling they wanted to be glued by my side and becoming annoying. The only exception is a man who I felt was the one, but who was like me in prioritizing oneself instead of relationships, and we broke up because we wanted to live in different countries. If I'd decided to remain with him and leave my friends and family now I would be married and bitter, or just divorced. Attachment theory says I am an anxious-avoidant, but in any case when I tried to fix my issues with therapy I still wanted to run away and be single. My life is super rich, with friends, family and 6 little nephews I see a lot, lots of hobbies, volunteering, exciting solo trips with some fun fleeting flings... I feel like I should be trying to date seriously but I keep postponing it because the kind of partner that would want to have a proper relationship with me wouldnt really enrich my life so much and seems a lot of work for little gain. Honestly when I meet my friends married with children I feel I go there to entertain them with my stories and they complain about their exhausting lives

I want to get married for the tax deductions!! Please my money is just flying away!

Amazing presentation!

what you are telling is the ultimate truth. It defies the notions of the society and people in their heart know what you are telling is true. Kudos to you!! I am gonna break do that too!

If being single is such a great thing, why does it seem you're trying to sell it? 🤔

32 and single. Constantly asked how a woman like me is single. Easy, I enjoy it and it's gonna take a truly special individual to change that.

i lost my 10 minutes and leave

60% divorce rate. It's not all roses.

That constant fake laughing makes it hard to take her seriously.

Furthermore, I don't need a speaker to tell me single people can be happy. I am happy to be alone and that's all. There is nothing wrong with that.

It's true that there's pressure from every direction to get married or at least be in a relationship. Don't let it get to you.

Get to know yourself, be happy with yourself, and create a life that makes you feel good about who you are, then you might be ready for a healthy relationship. Or maybe you'll discover you don't need one.

Why is she making it a competition? Do we have to insult others to feel good about ourselves? That's unhealthy. One is not better than the other. Whichever lifestyle works best for you is the one you should live. Whatever you choose, there is nothing wrong with that.

Stop looking for ted talks to justify your choices.

This woman doesn’t seems to be happy

As a 53-year-old mgtow, I'll say that the push for women to be professionals more than mothers, and that marriage "isn't for everyone" is leading to an inevitable worldwide population crash that will be an absolute horror show of misery on a global scale. But hey - the most important thing is for YOU to be happy.

I really wanted to like this video. Her constant giggling distracted from the message and made me turn it off a few short minutes in.