REACTING TO *YOUR* FIRST SENTENCES! giving feedback + lowkey fangirling over my subscriber's books

Missed the community post but here is my first sentence!

"Metal against metal clanked together, echoing throughout the large training room."

Don't want to add the rest as it reveals my character's names lol. But it is the first sentence of my WIP.

Aaaa I keep missing them but uh the opening for my book is meant to be ominous and is clearly not spoken by the main character as it seems to be talking to him, it also is very off-putting compared to the rest of the book so far. This is also my first project, It also is a line that continues at the end of the book (aka you wont know what the end of the line is until its over so hahaha). I also am not many chapters in so far so yeah, but here it is

"Some changes will be made.
You may not even realize it at first, my dear Theseus.
But things will change,"

I might change it but yeahhh. At the end of the line it just starts with the main book but yes, very proud of this, sorry I talked so much

I loved some of these, they were really good and also the last one made me just think about how much Jesus does actaully love me and you and your neighbor and all of us and how selfless that love is.

These are all so amazing!!! Mine is also short but idk how good it is XD.

I know I'm two months late but Just for fun this is my first sentence.

“Are you awake?” Kenneth heard a soft-spoken but high-pitched voice ask. He opened his eyes to an unfamiliar sight.

Please do another one of these videos so you can see mine

Wake up, eat go to school. at school: don’t do too well (smart=attention) but don’t do too bad (failing will get you labeled as a looser and outcast, labels=attention) what does attention equal you might ask…Death.

This is the start of a book I’m writing that’s about a world baits on rolls in a book. So there’s the Main Character, side character and background characters. If someone fails to play their roll they’ll be executed. And my main character is a background character.

You have inspired me so much Ana I love your account 😭😭🤧🤧

These lines are so beautiful omg mine feels so basic

This was amazing. Had goosebumps throughout the video. These first lines are phenomenal and inspiring and had me wanting to know what happened next.

I was late for this, but here's what I would've wrote anyway:
"I stand and watch as my own mother gets lowered into the ground."

One of my favorite first lines is that from notes from the underground. It begins like this: "I'm a sick man . . . a spiteful man . . . an unattractive man, that's what I am. " like you immediately begin to wonder why he thinks that.

Currently, the first sentence of my book rests at:
"They're going to find out within a month. Tick tock, tick tock."

And that's all that's there in the prologue and it immediately jumps to a scene of my protagonist's daily life. She sits on a big secret, but even she doesn't know the real secret. But those lines will keep you on your toes to learn that secret.

this video was cool

this video was cool

In the dark gloomy street,on a bouncy hill next to a bus station.

Please make a part two!!! I would love to submit mine to see what you say!!!

You should totally make another video like this!

Man, the video was SO useful since I was struggling to write the first sentence in my book. For those wondering...

Anger lingered everywhere... She couldn't hold it. No, there was no way she could hold her anger.
And she was me.

Ok first of all this is my moms account but this is not me lol. But I know ana will probably never see this but I thought I would do my first sentence! :)

"Libby Clampitt sat still, but her mind was far from it."

can there be a part two? i missed this because i wasn't in your community back then <3

I'm a hopeless romantic and the 2nd already made me cry XDX

This is mine:

Most stories you hear have an happy ending, not ours though. We were children, not heroes, and our story was never even meant to end..

As I lie in the soft snow with fresh wounds, I contemplate whether to lie here and wait for an even icier embrace, my father is not a kind man. That I've known all my life, and I can put all that behind me if I close my eyes.

Just started creative writing again so this is my first attempt in a while

Mine is, “It’s been 2 years since I decided to jump of the helicopter and stay in the Texan Clan.”

this is mine

"its funny how 'nobody' isn't really a description. its more off an opinion that people follow."

I know this is pretty late, but here's the first line of a short story I'm working on:

"Everything around me, from the soothing crashing of waves against shore to the chill autumn breeze slowed down as time reluctantly came to a halt, compelled by Death’s silent command."

You inspire me, dear Ana ❤!

This is mine.

“It wasn’t my blood”
“But It was his.”

"She ran her fingers through her matted, oily hair in the sunless room. They sat almost shoulder to shoulder, and it stank of sweat and bodily fluids. She didn't know how long she had been here- a week seemed too short, a month? Two months? All she knew was that her hair was noticably longer."
C:

"The sun hadn't set in four days" just reminds me of summer in northern Scandinavia. The sun actually doesn't set. Just like it doesn't rise at all during a period in the winter. In the parts that are north of the polar circle.

Here's mine: (it might be bad I'm quite a young and inexperienced writer)

What if you could freeze time? Everyone has an idea for what they’d want to do. One day, I got the opportunity to put that plan into action.

The story is called Time Freeze.

Wow amazing guys!!!

The first paragraph from debut fantasy revenge: Someone was sitting on the throne. But it wasn't the king. It was the beginning of a reign that would shake the kingdom to its core. The subjugated area was a graveyard by now, bodies scattered everywhere while a warrior was brought on top of the hanging device. Several men hung him on a rope, his bloodstained black hair dangling down from his head, as if it was trembling with fear. The bestowed throne was seated by a maniac, his red eyes glowing of pleasure. The warrior caressed the silk rope with his palm, reassuring himself that everything will be okay. The fear of the warriors were in rhythm with a few men chanting slurs towards the people of the opposing side, but what could they do? All of them were tied up to the same, tight rope. The to-be-beheaded warrior’s screams were muffled as the men also put a layer of strong cloth onto his mouth. Mere seconds away from his death, the warrior’s eyes glowed a shade of red, orange, yellow, green, blue, indigo, and violet at the same time, displaying the colors of the rainbow in his iris. But the countdown stopped. Why? Because on certain times, a rainbow doesn’t mean good luck.

Thank you for the reaction video Ana, please review this!

Mine was (Blood Oath of Gold (Wattpad)) “My son,” King Minan, ruler of the Kingdom of Gold demanded, “please, step forward.” That was just the prologue, it's my favourite part of the book so far! It isn't as cool as everyone elses' but it's pretty okay. Chapter one is “Don’t even try to escape, little one, I won’t kill you. It is dishonourable.”

Not me trying very hard to stop my brain from stealing thses lines because god they are so pretty!!

Mine is: “All I could hear was the screaming of college students”

Bro was just fangirling but im here for it

This is mine (it’s draft 0 so it’s probably gonna change)

“The blood spilled and stained the carpet that lied beneath my weak body”.

Idk if this is good (pls give tips)
But here’s mine: sometimes my nightmares make me think society hates me, but in my nightmares I see her

I want to share mine too! 😊

“Milo stepped out of the car and looked up at the dusty building that was now considered his new home, Ashbrook Orphanage.

Clara grunts, grabbing Klam, putting her calf to his shin and throwing him over her leg, “now that's what you call a tai otoshi” Clara boasts, “that's what you can do? Should I be scared?” Klam playfully questions, Clara grabs his hand and helps him up, “I’ll be able to protect our squad!” she says, punching the air, making sure her punches are straight and strong, “You don’t need to protect EVERYONE, at least yourself included” Klam says, giggling at her confidence, “hey, don’t laugh” Clara says, looking at the time, “We’re late for school!” she yells, rushing, “Calm down, we’ll be fine-“ “We have a TEST!” She yells, dragging him towards the school and going to her locker, by luck, it was just a few minutes before class, “See? We’re here, can’t you chill, school isn’t that important” Klam says, rolling his eyes “Well, unlike you, I want an education, so I’m not skipping school because ‘boo hoo I’m so lazy’” Clara says mockingly “I’m not lazy, just, uhm…. prone to being tired” Klam says with a shrug “Totally” Clara rolls her eyes “At least I have goals” she mutters


(I think I shouldn't have rushed it)

Im making a writing thingy on wattpad and its going to be in third person, but focused on the villain. Everything that the villain does the narrator will try to justify and everything the heros do will be criticized. Eventually at the end of the book as the villain is put in jail, itll have him think about everything that happened and reveal that the narrator WAS the villain, and threaten you, the reader as if you were against him the entire time. Itll end with something like this
"And YOU. yes you. I know you fcking exist, what, do you think im stupid? You think im a bad person, dont you? I dont care. I don't fcking care what you think. I know that everything ive done was justified. I dont need you. I didn't need my parents, i didn't need Charlie, i don't need ANYONE. Im going to get out of here and when i do all of you will regret not being by my side.

Just you wait. "

They all can’t be good!

These made me realise maybe is need to change my first sentence-

heres mine,

i had never seen sunlight before, non of us had

Ana your reaction to my sentence has had me grinning since I saw it. Talk about a confidence boost! I think it’s time for me to get off my writing break 😊 thanks Ana.
(Also everyone else’s sentences?! Dang when are y’all publishing where can I read these)