Lower Your Standards? (Matthew Hussey)

Anyone that texts “how r u” is NEVER going to be a high-value winner. Period.

Perhaps the style of opening text message was his means of weeding out the divas straight off the bat and his command of language is exemplary.

Thank you for sharing. I agree self-awareness is key. I like how you focused on identifying character behaviors that align with knowing what is important to you. Knowing what you want from others is so much easier when you are aware of who you are and how you may be self-sabotaging.

Ask for her name before go on a date with her 😁

Men cannot set a high standard for themselves in dating when they are disabled! 😂😂😂

When you date someone make sure that you have standards according to your worth value! 😂😂😂

It shows a lot of yourself the person you are dating with!

Set at least a minimum standards what kind of partner you want to be with! Don’t settle for less like you sacrifice speed over good quality! 😂😂😂

You don't have to lower your standards. It's completely okay to have a high one; HOWEVER, you yourself should make sure that you have those standards.

I mean you shouldn't be asking for an honest, faithful, hard working, and kind boyfriend/girlfriend while you're lying, cheating, lazy, and selfish. That's just complete hypocrisy.

~I dont know if i agree with that?~Its easy to be nervous talking to someone new at first, and that first 15 minutes can be a bit awkward~Id prefer to email or text them for a good while, then meet for a daytime coffee date?~

Very good advice. Very relevant to me

That was really good clear advice that actually helped the girl vs judging her. Bravo!

This is great advice! Love what he said about kindness - that's definitely a dealbreaker for me too.

Women think high standards prove that they are worth more, but those things are separate. How good or valuable you are as a person is determined by your behavior not by the behavior of others or your material possessions. Also that girl is very very far away from the male ideal she is painfully below average to average.

When that girl said “how r u” is red flag I knew this was gonna be along video

That is a deal breaker. Something cant understand? Every man i am attracted to is kind.

God bless you all

Is this session in the PHI🇵🇭🇵🇭🇵🇭??

I'm 6'3" 200 lbs 11% bodyfat with a chiseled jawline. I'm dating a black women who has been called ugly by many men. She weighs 160 +. I enjoy hanging out with her.

Women are extremely picky nowadays. I prefer simplicity....hard to find. I could care less about dating someone hot. I don't need to prove anything. I just want to enjoy life.

I have to try to lower my standards it's rlly rlly high

This woman's position on text messages is insane! I have 3 masters degrees, a TEFL certificate, a certificate in advanced Spanish level 1 from Guatemala and a real estate license. In other words, I have no problem writing at a high academic level nor do I have any problems expressing myself in an educated manner. Yet when I send texts I use informal language and even improper English. That doesn't mean that I can't. I'm sure I could write circles around this woman if I wanted to. She has WAY too high of expectations!

You should maintain your standards if they are important to you. Never sacrifice your well being for others..you can adapt and compromise. However NEVER sacrifice your well being for anyone. The one who values you and see your worth will see and accept you for you.

Aw, I hope she finds someone like herself and gets married.
Then he divorces her when she makes a typo.

never lower your standards

Everyone is a little mean though. And how do you define kindness? If the bar for kindness is to be like Mother Theresa, I think we would have all failed.

I'm 31, men my age just message/text before a date. In regard to having a phone call before a date; should I initiate the phone call/ videocall? I am feminine and prefer to see a man lead. Would I schedule the phonecall or just call him?

yea 6ft tall and 6 figure income and high-value man will not get average women average ladies lower your standers you get married lower your standers we mean remove 6 ft tall remove 6 figure income removes the high-value man. my dad I, not a high-value man he is the same height as my mom eye level they have been married still for 65 years so see ladies you don't need a tall man also if he does not have a job don't leave your husband or he gets sick do not have a backup husband he on death bed. also, ladies, my dad lost his job my mom would have divorced him like any normal modern woman but what I and my mom did was we both got jobs to help my dad and I am the next man of my parent's house so I had to provide for my parents. ya ladies would off left your husband if he lost his job and was broke ya ladies are not loyle yea lower your standers please you be single for life he too small friend zone him cause he small or reject short guys but guess what that short man the guyyou friend zone was your mr right was your husban ladies no you want a tall man that will be fucking like 20 girls behinde you so good luck ladies you want a fuck boy .

So give them a chance. Something I’m not good a giving people unless it’s work related.
If not then I pretty my ignore half the small talk spoken.

Do the guy a favor and cancel the date cause no guy on earth would want to go out on a date with a woman with such a piss poor attitude.

"kindness is everything".. I disagree...I dated a guy who was kind and a male model but absolutely stupid..I'm talking absolutely nothing going on upstairs....I was never able to keep any conversation going. To this day I wonder if he was mentally disabled.

Hehe I was expecting some Taylor-like guy screaming "You gotta believe in yourself, you have tiger blood!" or something but this guy was really smart!

I think it’s not about lowering standards but knowing yourself and knowing what you want your relationship to be! If the guy does things you don’t like but you share a great life with him, does it matter he does certain things that bother you? I think we all need to have deal breakers like Matt said.. no every single thing can be a deal breaker.. because nobody is perfect.

this is usually most of the women. its sad to hear. so many guys hitting on them they become delusional. even by sending them a simple friendly text turns them off. sad world we live in.

Why's the entire audience only consist of asian women? Just curious.

Knowing what qualities you actually want from the other person is the most important

I feel like kindnesses is a given. (I don’t like to judge people for venting or figuring out stuff so that’s different from kindness to me.) Saying you want someone kind is like telling people you’ve been hurt before. Just something to think about while watching since no one really commented it in this way.

I tend to deliberately type ‘r’ or ‘u’ when texting just to make the conversation sound more like chitchatting rather than a formal ‘business’ kinda conversation. Tbh, i personally find using precise letters, commas and full stops while texting too boring. If such an irrelevant thing’s a dealbreaker than I probably wouldn’t bother wasting my time too 👋😂

For my part, either I take my time writing something correctly or I do not. Someone who does not uses punctuation and grammatical rules is someone who just does not care about it, probably reads very little. To me is important because mispelling is a sign of laziness.

Very well said!

80% of women think they deserve a top 20% man.

Unbelievable

this one time my neighbor Debbie hussey told my husband I dressed like a slut  then changed my clothes by the time he got home from work everyday

If a person cannot be bothered to properly text "How are you?" then it's very likely that's how they'll treat everything else -- laissez-faire attitude.

I can’t stand people who can’t spell, either.

Lixo

No wonder why some women stay single even in their 40s because of these high expectations that they have of men actually do more harm than good because no guy will ever be good enough for them so they will just keep rejecting them living in a delusion that their perfect guy will appear somehow

I suggest facetime, get nothing. Try and show my trueness through voice-memos, never get one back. Always text first, always left on read. Told by many I have the "model" look, yet never have success texting but in person? Can chat it up with damn near anyone. ladies, ya know it's not illegal to show interest, as a man who knows how to ACTUALLY TALK TO WOMEN IN PERSON, texting has made it seem as though you're playing the game too hard ladies. Guys don't text you for no reason, we are too logical to just see whats up, so take that as sign he is actually making an effort, and you leave us on read and we're like damn ok, I thought I texted her, ya know? We are so simple

future cat lady

It's impressive how Matthew translated her question from "R" and "U" to how to judge whether going on a date, then give a practice way to find that out.

Gentleman, how many of you have seen a profile in a dating app with a sentence along the lines of: "Under 6'? Swipe left".
And just like that, me (I'm 5'8") and 86% of man are no good enough for the majority of women.
And that is ONE of the requirements that you need to have for women just talking with you.
News flash, for the best guys, 6', 6 pack, 6 figures salary, jaw line, etc. These guys are having the time of their lives, and they won't settle down.
Because they don't need to
Because ALL the woman want them.

The thing with the facetime is that some people we look better in person than in a camara, so it's not fair to base my decision of meeting someone just because of the impression i got in the facetime. in the other hand one call is a good idea...

I'm with her! I hate texts like that and I know many others who do as well. It's as if they don't value the English language and they want to take shortcuts. So easy just to text that, and I feel as if they do it to several people at once. It's a turn off for me. Or at least a red flag.

This may sound snobby, but when I get a text like that I think it's just plain tacky.