This Could SAVE Your (Future) Marriage | Jordan Peterson Answers on What a Divorce Really Means

This is my marriage to a T. My wife has unresolved trauma that makes her up and leave at the slightest disagreement, she’s left at least 4 times to stay with her mom or dad already and I’m the steadfast one that doesn’t go anywhere and holds strong to my vows. It also has made me develop a type of PTSD where I’m always the scared cat thinking she could just leave again at any time and I don’t feel a strong foundation to put marriage and I don’t have a sense of security in our marriage…

My wife is an asshole. But i stay because my bond with my son means so much. I am thinking about leaving now rather than waiting any longer. I don't want to look back and see that my window has closed. I genuinely do not like my wife.

I mean, if she's trying to murder me in my sleep on a regular basis, it might be ok to leave

JP definitely cruises on the side for men. He seems like the typical Catholic “closet case” who needs mommy to wash his clothes while he goes to all male chemseggs parties. He hates women— it’s very clear

I believe I woke up way to late not knowing what a narcissist was I'm going back and forth for 36 years! Was not lucky in love always wanting to be married and have a big family my first wife 18 years and she left me after 18- years and got on drugs! Second wife from Mexico was the narcissist! I never knew what a narcissist was tell it was over and destroy me financially at the age of 62- years old! Have 8- children between the two of them and 9- grand children! Then blackmail them all against me! Then having betrayal trauma! Kinda hard to get back to working after all that!

THE LORD KNEW I COULD NOT PHYSICALLY HANDLE CHILDREN WITH MY EX! AND I SEE WHY THE THINGS UNFOLDED THE WAY THEY DID NOW! AND I THANK GOD FOR SHIELDING ME! EVEN THOUGH MOTHERHOOD WAS ALL I FELT I EVER WANTED!

I was in a relationship like that for four years. It was a nightmare.

Jordan, your perspective leaves out a lot! Find out your wife is cheating on you and see if your reality isn't blown to pieces. Even you Jordan cannot put humpty Dumpty back again. Would you keep honoring a business contract knowing your partner is robbing you blind? I don't think so or your one dumb person.

Well, when your spouse is doing whatever and won't talk to you, belittles you for being vulnerable and then pushes you out of the house for the second time... Yeah, I'm out. She'll never change until she addresses her childhood traumas

5 love languages, Gary chapmen an amazing book to read together

For this to work, both parties have to be LOYAL. Too many men CHEAT and think it’s acceptable since they have no intention of leaving their wives. No one deserves to remain in a marriage with a cheater.

The only thing wrong with my parents' divorce is that it took way too long to happen!

Didn’t your daughter divorce his husband.

The concept in thinking you can be miserable in the only relationship in life youll ever have if you pick the wrong person, is really sad, that to me is not an accomplishment its a zero accomplishment. Early religious conditioning , all about suffering.

Maybe thats why he always looks so angry LOL !!!!!!

Problem is: Modern women in the West can vow all day long but they always reserve the right to change their minds. That's just a fact. I'm not picking on women because I'm a misogynist. I say this because women are the ones filing for divorce 70% of the time. I don't think the average person in the West realizes how much impact modern feminism has in informing our views and attitudes. It's crept into every corner of our culture. Now we have created this weird dicotomy where most women are never held accountable for anything ever. The younger they are the more likely they've never been held accountable. Without accountability you cannot admit that you are trouble too.

too true and powerful
-vladimir obama yakuza kiwami scheme

no you can divorce if it didnt workout man i dont get people really forcing themself in in unhappy all their life for an men made agreement

I used to think that marriage is forever, too. Until my wife cheated on me two months into our marriage. I found out about a year later and we agreed to fix wherever caused this to happen.
Fast forward 13 years, i have nothing but contempt for her as with time more lies came about. To give the devil its due. I was not fully invested from that betrayal forward and did things that were detrimental as i felt justified. In the end we are both left hurting and our kids suffer for it.

Sometimes, we are just naive. Vetting properly could have saved us all the trouble. Similar values, growing up in healthy families and being honest should be of up most importance.

This is literally me and my partner, his uncle abused him when he was 5 and every time I do or say something he doesn't like he threatens to leave. We have three kids together and he swears he is over the abuse and has moved on but I see the cracks all the time.

Can someone point me to the original video?

Divorce was invented by a man but is being used by mostly women. Shit idk what I’m typing.

This is why Gods plan is best for marriage. No option for divorce except possibly infidelity or abuse. If the option to divorce is not there, the marriage is more likely to succeed.

My 56 year old husband is planning to leave me once our son goes to university in two years. He is slowly devaluing me now. It is very painful. He says it has nothing to do with me so all hopes of change and reconciliation is shut down. I know that it's more of his need to seek novelty! I don't know what to do. I'm mourning all the positive things we bring into the relationship!!

I swore to God and before a lot of people that I'd love my wife 'til my dying breath. Year 1 was rough, but instead of splitting, I stayed true by God's grace. We've been married for almost a dozen years now, love each other more than ever, and cherish our lives together with our kids. I'm with her, ride or die.

I think it depends on the personalities of other people the situation.
I agree with both stances.

Staying together should be the goal …
But some men like my husband, think that means they can do whatever they want and whatever they want because you’re not not going anywhere … so they ignore you and neglect you and act like they already have you so why work on the relationship?.

And I stupidly allowed him to have that attitude for far too long because I refuse to leave even if it was a temporary thing…

Some men need to know that if they pull certain types of things that you’re not going to stick around and break the covenant and the vows you made on your wedding day.

There is more to the marriage covenant and breaking it other than infidelity and abuse … there is neglect and self-centered, selfish self-serving behavior; not providing for your family; He was saying anything in and unhealthy manner to cope with your issues… ALL THESE THINGS ALSO BREAK THE MARRIAGE.

Now, if you can bring up those issues and discuss them and work through them , there’s no need to leave… yet if that person is not concerned and fights with you and calls you names and attacks you for bringing up something that is a problem to them… this is an endpoint because you can’t improve the marriage if the other person won’t see where the problems are.

The course of action you have after trying to resolve things several times is to put up with it continue hurting and risk being hurt over and over or take a leave of absence with the hope that it’s temporary.

I screwed up and betrayed my loves trust… but god I just want to fix it.

Honestly, I`m taking this as proof that marriage is not worth it...Considering how most people leave at the drop of a hat this man is asking for the other extreme. Sure the point is to stay through thick and thin but not "No matter what happens". What if your spouse cheats on you? what if they deeply betray you? What if they abuse you or try to kill you? "No matter what" is an extreme and moronic perspective. I respect Jordan Peterson but this is one of his opinions I deeply disagree with.

"But if you're at each other's throats, good luck to you." Well, that solved my problem.

I don’t disagree with dr Peterson, I think a 5 minute portion of this lecture is lacking crucial information. “I’ve got you and you’ve got me and I’m not leaving, unless….” That’s where the vows come in. I will honor you, cherish you and keep myself for you until death do us part. You cheat (not keeping yourself for your partner) then you broke the vow and your spouse is free immediately. Not something you should ever be expected to try to work through because you’re not gonna. We all know, that is gonna sit in the back of your mind forever and just eat away at you.

A fairy tale world.

"I'm not leaving leaving-ever"is exactly what the abuser says in every relationship.Even moreso "your no t leaving-ever"

Til death so us part.
That's the point of marriage.

Staying for the sake of staying or even staying because of the kids is a grave mistake. If your spouse cheated on you, then call it done. It wasn’t a mistake, it was a choice they made knowing full well how much it would hurt you but they did it anyway.

"I'm not leaving, no matter what!". Literally the worst possible thing you can say if you're in a relationship with a narcissist.

I agreed divorce is not an option all by myself. My husband not so much

Great video! Praying my wife learns this before it's too late

Not only am I leaving, I’m running as fast as I can!

I agree with this. It’s a vow I took before God and I take it seriously. My wife wants a divorce and I told her no. If she needs space then go have some but I’m not going anywhere. I said for better or worse not “ I don’t feel like it” till DEATH (meaning my lifetime) does us part. The courts need to stop enticing and interfering in these types of divorce. I’m not talking about abuse. I’m talking about everything else

My God I feel like I'm the only one that thinks the vows actually mean something. It's hard at times, work it out for fck sake.

so all u ned to do
is sit down and reflect about who gave you life
and then who takes it away

i can write a whole book on death journey. i know too much about death.

i can take u to a grave and explain in detail what the nature is doing and how its effecting the soul.

the best the christian theocrat can offer is 'could'

All true, and the costs exceed what is stated here.

This is the 68th ad Jordan pushed on me on May 16

Jordan needs to address as part of a disciplinary probation order, a period of suspension may be imposed prior to the effective date of the probation. The Board's Disciplinary Guidelines provide details of the conditions under which a suspension may be made a part of the probation order. During suspension, licensees may not practice psychology or refer to themselves as psychologists. As indicated above in "Probation," suspensions are considered disciplinary actions associated with probation orders and, as such, are public information and provided to consumers upon request.

Jordan is a Frasier Crane wannabe. He is an entertainer not a psychologist. Because he sells books and videos and lectures, THAT IS NOT THERAPY. He needs to address his bad conduct in courts in the case of Case 1 Sordi v. Sordi, 2009 CanLII 80104 (ON SC) he defamed a parent in court. In the case 2 R. v. Pearce, 2012 MBQB 22 (CanLII) he tried to free a murderer. Then in the case Peterson v. College of Psychologists of Ontario, 2023 ONSC 4685, he tried to avoid taking responsibility. He also tried to interfere in a family court case in Montana, the Kolstadt case, where there was a GAG order, he unprofessionally diagnosed a minor without interviews or assessments, and tried to defend unfit parents.

What about when your wife has an affair and wants a divorce? I'm still trying to get her back.

Amen!

Don't get married. Marriage isn't for everyone. Live together for a while and see if you can stand each other.

It sadly only takes one person to want divorce. As an individual you can do all the work, have all the knowledge and have all the will to make marriage last and sustain. But if the other person wants out, there's not a damn thing you can do about it.