How to make my bully boss treat me better

Lol sorry for blowing up your phone. I just wanted to get some of the Dan O’Connor communication videos to you. Pop around his channel there is a lot there. 👍

I almost didn’t watch this video but then I remembered a colleague who is often inappropriate, professionally, is now my manager.
I began to take control of our conversations over a year and a half ago. Today I learned some new power phrases to set the tone and rules. I am going to practice and start using them effectively.

I attained financial freedom a year ago this month. My “bosses“ do not realize I can literally, not figuratively, walk away from my job at a moment’s notice. This plus keeping myself marketable is true Power.
Thank you for your videos!

Thank you. I needed to hear you.
Awesome !!!!

These are some helpful tips in language and communication.

I’m in my 25th day on the job, my birthday was last week. They want to take me out Monday, however, my boss snarls at me when I ask questions about work, yet she is also direct.

Should I go or turn it down?

I have a bullying boss who knows I think he's bullying and he knows I think he's insecure. It's pretty much impossible to work for him - if I improve my performance, he finds ways to cut me down, if I then am down, he's disappointed about me not trying harder. In front of others, he's fake understanding and compassionate to show he isn't bullying me, because he knows this reputation has developed about him and it could affect his authority and his standing with other employees.

Going to a nuthouse every day. Worst thing - there are many co-workers here who bully me too, because they see the boss do it, so they just jump on the bandwagon.

Feeling empowered!

I'm feeling like a failure because yesterday I met at the park with my bosses and they said "I have to let you go". The reason they gave me is that I'm forgetting the processes while making the projects. Which is jewelry etc. The projects always turned out even if I forgot something for a moment because of anxiety. Deep down I feel it was something deeper. Can they get to this point because I don't have the same belief system as they do?

My boss had very few of these qualities and still they were putting down me with their comments that i lack soft skills. When asked for specific they had no answer. All this talk was during negotiations of salary : clearly they were manipulating me so I would not negotiate much.

Too late I just did the "do not" at the beginning 😐😓

Love your videos and your amazing personality and great advice

I love your content but this would never work with my boss. He would probably roll his eyes.

Dan how do you respond to a boss that says to you- " I can't go around writing up people for being ugly or I would have no employees." " Ya know Denise we all choose to be offended..." ?

Aww! Look at your dear puppy ❤

Just perfect. ❤️

I’d love to find that link and have one on one communication on my
Specific expressions
To mejorar mi being.
Best
A

I'm a little confused by the 'i know you're at effective x' because my boss is not at all. One of our biggest points of contention work integrity, he gets upset by me trying to do a good job. Am I trying to convince him to change? That seems pretty unlikely.

Thank god I found you!!! My stomach has been in knots for days as I avoid my obnoxious daughter. Out of nowhere I suddenly became public enemy No1 for posting a picture of a new grandchild 🤷🏽‍♀️
Need more help on how to deal with horrible adult kids. The unique problem with them is that you don’t want to hurt them to ‘Shut them down’, yet they have no such concern.

I wish I knew you when….
90% is our response. It’s amazing how emotions play such a destructive path with soft skills of passionate personalities.
Thank you for your time spent teaching how to separate the emotion to clearly convey a powerful message.

i have been in this job for 19 years and retiring soon. I have tried over the years to educate my current boss of 15 years that we needed a different form of treatment from her.... she always took it personally and defensively, with no coworkers backing me up. She would calm down for about a week but would go right back to her old ways. I do take some of the blame for not engaging more often against her bad behavior but I cannot take the blame for her return to bad behavior every time.... I will be leaving a letter of suggestions for her when I am gone. You're awesome, by the way!!!

Thank you Dan, my boss constantly disrespects my peers, residents, vendors and myself in front of people. I have reasons to believe she’s insecure and is afraid of failure, so she uses us to hide her insecurities and show dominance. I told myself today, that I will not allow her to continue her behavior but first I want to plan accordingly before I go ahead and speak my mind.

Love these lessons.

What happens if your boss is the millennial and drags in executives that have respect for you and bad mouths you in front of them. These executives on counting on me to work with him.

You have made this so entertaining to watch😂

Love it!

You’re amazing 🎉

Hey Dan! I have a good topic for you: How do I respond to unnecessary criticism at work (I‘m talking about when you made a tiny human mistake, it‘s sorted out but your boss still makes a comment to ‚remember to do X next time‘). Essentially how can we deal with a nitpicky colleague that isn‘t quite a bully but their comments are quite demoralising? Mine always makes unnecessary criticism about my work and sends a smiley face - so annoying!

Are you a supporter of the Portuguese National Selection Team of Portugal? I am Portuguese. :)

Thanks

I think your suggested responses for instance to deal with nasty people's comments and similar have very good suggestions, but lots of your suggested responses are incredibly lengthy and complicated, some 5 sentence replies etc.... The thing is when person is starting to give back lengthy response, it automatically starts to sound like they are really affected by whatever person said, or putting lots of effort in response and that makes the nasty person automatically win. In the cases like that the shorter sentence and fewer words is more power.

Dan is always who I turn to for absolute golden nougats of skills I need to perfect. I share his content with family members who struggle....he is the consummate communicator who is making positive how-to's for a world that has somehow lost it's ability to have meaningful relationships.... it's possible to have them as long as we have respect for ourselves, first and foremost. Then, we can truly respect others. Dan is fantastic.

Thankyou. Dan can you answer or do a video on what to do or say if a person in charge of you is not passing on your work for the decision makers to see? It’s exhausting because I put all this work in and it disappears. I’m isolated in a small team and not allowed to talk to the CEO, and it seems to others, about my work apart from through her.

Also where's the narcissistic boss video? I cant find it.

How do I become your client?

D.O.C. I came looking for you today (On YT, not irl). Apparently many people use communication skills as a weapon instead of using them as a tool (to build something better). Have you ever heard of people using “The Broken Record” as a technique to not engage in anything the other person is saying? What would D.O.C. do in that situation?

Thank you. This is amazing

I have to watch this video over and over again to practice how to say this to my coworker.

Dan, I googled that and your picture came up . You are an excellent resource . I always refer people to tune in to your channel . You are a beautiful soul 👍🥂Happy New Year .

Absolutely fantastic advice! I will note this but I hope this doesn’t happen to me. I try to practice kindness, but I need to build up boundaries and follow through with it.

I Love you! 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽because your messages are life savers for what could go horribly wrong in what could be a very wonderful work environment 🤜🤛🏾 I work at a restaurant and my boss unnecessarily called me and idiot in front of staff when asking if I can go home early to be with family on NYE since there wasn’t a job position for me to do that night and when I tried to rebut with “ no I’m not an idiot” he told me to shut up and get out of the kitchen. Grated he’s usually drunk and might not remember but it’s humiliating and acts this way often…I almost called him an asshole😂

My first video of 2023! Setting myself up for success! Happy New Year, Dan!!!

👉I hope many, but especially younger people, watching this take such tips to heart, it could prevent a lifetime of heartache for at least them, and possibly others!

"I am here abour my Father's business,"... I work as unto the Lord. He who giveths and takeths away is my ultimate boss!
Wow, Dan!!! You logically and systematically laid out several golden points here!
Since subscribing recently, your professionalism, tips, and humour have exceeded my expectations and earned my sincerest gratitude.
Thank you very much! 🙏🌟🇨🇦

Thanks!

Thanks! God bless you and Happy New Year Dan !!!!! 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻🏆
(A humble gift, not mistaken duplicates )

I meant NOT being accustomed...apologies.

Thanks!

Thanks!

Thanks!

Yessssss! I
Your teaching is thrilling. I’ve never heard anything like your message. It gives me hope and shows me direction to my next endeavors for my development. Thank you!

OKay a bit iffy about your phrasing. I agree that if you are engaging with a mature, reasonable and professional adult, this i your way. Perfect. But, that is not often the case for the employee and if they 'take responsibility' in any way, it will be twisted (if necessary) and used against them. So, Joe apologized for his difficulty in doing his job effectively.' Even better: 'Jan even apologized to Sara for allowing her work difficulties to deteriorate.' Bye Jan. Your best advice Dan, is: (in my words) is this person a mature, reasonable and professional AND self-aware (hence mature) adult or will they most likely emotionally explode, cast the interaction as you attacking them and wreck your life. If you are in an environment that is not conducive to grown-up communication skills, GET OUT!!!!!!!!!!!!! Do NOT subject yourself to the emotional, and potential professional, damage this person can and will do to you.

Once we start sliding down the slippery slope of becoming accustomed to being in a work constructive environment, it WILL gradually chip away at you and transform you into a shadow of your old self. Fixing that can take years, at LEAST!

You would not, presumably, remain in a space with deadly radioactive material, right? Think of it that way because that is exactly where you are. Think technical like this rather than personal. Get out of that environment asap and, in the meantime, create a protective bubble around yourself that nourishes and validates your value. Let that poorly managed company or workplace stew in its own rot or implode. Goodbye. Take care of YOU.